Jaune Beats all the First Years
by blaiseingfire
Summary: Jaune realizes that if he can't outmatch his opponents in strength, he can out play and out smart them. With a mini tournament coming up, can he succeed? (let's be honest, you probably already know the answer). Will it be awesome? Yes. Will it be action packed? Yes. Will it be hilarious? Yes. Will it come back to bite him in the butt? Absolutely! Coverart by maxinummerone
1. Chapter 1

**CHAP 1: Operation Blackmail**

 **Evening: Beacon Library**

"Good evening Mister Ozpin", the library receptionist greeted with a warm smile.

"Hello again ma'am," Ozpin kindly responded, "I am here to return this book and possibly check out a new one."

"Ok no problem." she said as she took the book from Ozpin who nodded in thanks. "Just come back when you find another book and I'll check it out for you." Ozpin nodded and went off to search for a book. After several minutes of searching Ozpin came across a book series he overheard several of his students talk about. He took the the next book of the series and began to walk back the receptionist's desk when something caught his eye.

Jaune Arc was sitting by a computer desk with sheets of paper littered about and a backpack hanging from the back of his chair. Ozpin could have swore that Jaune was mumbling to himself as he was studying what was on the pages. Ozpin decided to investigate and see what the boy was so focused on.

"Jaune Arc?" The person in question nearly jumped out of his seat in panic and tried to grab and hide the many of the papers on the desk.

"Oh, it's just you headmaster." Jaune said as he calmed down. "What's up?"

"Please, call me Ozpin." The headmaster happily relied. "And I can ask you the same thing. If I remember correctly, none of the first year classes have and exams for the next few weeks or homework assignments for the next few days. So if you don't mind me asking, what has got your attention?" Ozpin asked as he picked up a piece of paper Jaune dropped on the floor.

He was surprised to see a picture perfect drawing of Ruby Rose from team RWBY with information written down about her fighting style, strengths, semblance, and a little bit of her history. Putting the paper down, Ozpin saw that the rest of the papers were similar, but were on many other of the first year students.

"Did you know that I haven't been able to beat anyone in a one-on-one duel in Miss Goodwitch's class?" Jaune asked, gaining Ozpin's attention. "I've been called many things, both in front of my face and behind my back, and bullied because of it. And well, I've just decided that I've had enough."

"So, you are studying and doing research on all of the first year students to figure out how so effectively combat them?" Ozpin asked with growing curiosity.

"Well, sort of." Jaune replied as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. "I learned that no matter how hard I practice and train, I won't be anywhere near the physical level to go toe-to-toe with anyone anytime soon." At this Ozpin looked back at the paper in his hand and noticed what was written at the bottom : **Ruby is experimenting with electric rounds for Crescent Rose. If she hits my shield when it's coated with electric dust powder, the shock will set of her dust rounds prematurely and incapacitate her. -on a side note, Pyrrha has taught me how to deflect incoming rounds and deflect them at an angle -maybe an unfortunate member could get electrocuted by a ricochet…?** "So, I'm-"

"Learning how fight and counter your enemy without using brute force." Ozpin interrupted with the sudden revelation.

"Exactly!" Jaune replied cheerfully. "I can't fight fire with fire, so I'm going to fight fire with water." Jaune paused and cringed a little at how that sounded.

"Outsmart and outmaneuver your enemy. A bold strategy Mister Arc." Ozpin congratulated. "How soon will you put this into play?"

"Tomorrow during Glynda's class." Ozpin raised an eyebrow. "I've been planning for this for a while now, and I believe I'm ready for this."

"Well I wish the best of luck to you Mr. Arc. Enjoy the rest of your evening." Ozpin said as he began to walk away. He could have sworn he heard the sound of a scroll go off, but ignored it.

"Wait!" Jaune called out, prompting the headmaster to pause and turn around. "Actually, since you're here, can I ask you something?"

"Certainly," Ozpin responded as he took a couple steps back toward Jaune.

"Can you do me a small favor. Actually, two small favors?" Ozpin nodded. "Can you make it so that in Goodwitch's class tomorrow I'm in the first match of the class and I'm fighting Yang Xiao Long? I know Miss Goodwich is have a 'winner stays in' type of tournament and I want to start off." Ozpin started at Jaune in silence for several seconds in stunned silence.

"I can understand your enthusiasm to prove yourself and I look forward to it, but are you sure you want to start with one of the best among your class as well as fight multiple people in such short time? And what makes you think politely asking the headmaster of the academy to rig the system for one's favor would work?" Ozpin asked with skepticism and curiosity.

"As I've said before, I've been preparing for a while now and I believe I'm ready. And if you don't," Jaune said with a grin growing on his face, "well… imaging what your students and fellow faculty will think when they find out that their headmaster is a fan of… literature of erotic nature." Jaune replied while gesturing towards the Ninjas of Love book in Ozpin's hand.

"Oh come now Mister Arc." Ozpin replied with a smug grin. "You honestly believe such talk won't be passed on as just mere rum-...rumors." Ozpin dropped his grin and his face paled as Jaune showed him a picture on his scroll of himself walking away from the camera with the book in question in his hands, the title in clear view. _No, I can't let that get out._

"Pictures don't lie." Jaune replied, wearing the grin Ozpin had moments before. Ozpin quickly recomposed himself. "And I have cloud back ups of it."

"Well played Mister Arc, well played. I will do your request, if you delete that after you matches."

"Deal. Arc's word." Jaune replied as they shook hands. Jaune then looked at his scroll. "Oh crap I'm late. Gotta go! See you later." Jaune quickly gathered his belongings and took off.

"Tomorrow is going to be an interesting day." Ozpin said to himself as he walked back to the receptionist's desk while thinking of how to get back at his student for blackmailing him.

* * *

 **A/N:** _What do you guys think? Like it, hate it? Leave a review, all criticism is welcomed._

 _Big special thanks to Qopster for beta reading while this was being writen and for some of the ideas, and a thanks ExoRipper for giving it a final view over._

 _Next chapter will be uploaded tomorrow._


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** _96 follows and 70 favorites in 24 hours. I... wow. I was literally giddy like a school boy at all of the email notifications I was getting for reviews, favorites, reviews, and PM's. Thank you guys so much._

 _Here's the next chapter. I hope you enjoy!_

* * *

 **Chap 2: Team Rwby and Cardin**

 **The next day, late afternoon: Beacon's Sparring Classroom**

"Good afternoon everyone." Glynda Goodwitch greeted her class as her students took their seats. "Headmaster Ozpin has made a surprise visit and will be spectating the matches today. In addition, we will have a new rule in play for today: the winner of each match will move on to fight the next opponent. The contestant with the most wins will receive a small prize of 500 lien."

Many students in the stands started talking amongst themselves at this. Many were annoyed that they had to do more work, some of the weaker funters groaned in annoyance, while a majority of the others started making bets as to who could get the most wins.

"Now with that said, let start." Glynda said as she slid a finger along her scroll to start the selection for the match. "First up, we have… Yang Xiao Long."

"Yay!" Said huntress cheered as she fist bumped up into the air.

"And your opponent will be… Jaune Arc." Glynda called out with slight confusion. _Strange, I could have sworn I made it so only those with similar skill levels will fight together. Maybe a glitch in the system?_

"Woo!" Yang called out as she rushed to the arena. Jaune was about to get up when Pyrrha grabbed his arm.

"Be careful Jaune." She warned with concern. "Remember, she's one of the top of our class, there's no shame in losing."

"It's alright Pyrrha, I'll be fine." Jaune replied. He made his way towards the opposite side of the arena, few taking notice of the new messenger bag hanging on his side. Jaune marched into position just opposite of Yang.

"You ready Jaune?" Yang asked, getting pumped up.

"R-ready as I'll ever b-be." Jaune replied in fraudulent nervousness.

"Hmm. So, what's in the purse Vomit Boy?" Yang asked chuckling to herself. Others in the crowd joined in.

"It's a messenger bag." Jaune replied in a monotone voice. "As for what's in it, it's a trade secret." _She noticed it faster than I thought. This is good._

"You may begin!" Miss Goodwitch announced.

"You know, that is a very nice purse you have there," several people in the audience started chuckling again, "and it'd be a real shame if it got blown apart. So you know what I'm gonna do?" After her taunt, Yang unclipped Ember Celica and tossed both gauntlet to the side and took a boxer stance. Many in the crowd oh'd and ah'd at this. _I don't want to be too hard on him. Pyrrha would never let me hear the end of it._

"You know what?" Jaune asked in response. _Perfect! This is better than I hoped._ Jaune then took unsheathed Crocea Mors from his armor straps, tossed it aside, and mimicked Yang's stance. "I'll play your game." Now this got everyone's attention. The crowd got louder with cheers and snickers, many calling out on Jaune's foolishness and betting on him lasting less than a minute. The rest of JNPR grew concerned at their leaders rash decision while RWBY cheered for their fellow brawler, while also cheering for her to take it easy.

"Ooh! Vomit Boy grew a pair, who knew." Yang taunted. "You know what? Here." Yang leaned forward, tilted her head up and closed her eyes. "I'll give you a free first move. Hit me as hard as you can." She tapped her cheek a couple of times then raised her hand to her side. "Give me your best shot."

After a few moments Jaune began to walk forward. His feet echoed with each step. Everyone in the audience held their breath in anticipation for the thrashing that they thought was going to happen . Pyrrha held her hand over her mouth while Nora was bouncing in her seat. Yang still had her hands held up to her side with a huge shit eating grin on her face and her eyes still closed. So she didn't see Jaune pull something out of his messenger bag.

"You know Yang, you probably hear this a lot," Jaune said as he continued to walk forward, "But you have really nice hair." Jaune stopped as he was now directly in front of Yang. "It would be a shame if..." In the span of a second, Jaune reached over her shoulder and pulled a hand full of hair in front of him and Yang. Yang opened her eyes in confusion and saw that Jaune was holding her hair in one hand and in the other he had a… HAIR BUZZER… held just an inch away from her hair. "...something bad were to happened to it." Jaune grinned darkly as he turned the buzzer on.

Everyone, including Ozpin and Glynda, were shocked at what they were seeing. Ruby had her mouth covered with both hands. Blake had her jaw dropped. Weiss' eye was twitching as she tried to comprehend what she was seeing. Pyrrha was biting her nails. Ren has his eyebrows raised in shock. Nora was eating popcorn. Yang stood still, then slowly started to lower her arms as her eyes were turning from violet to pure blood red.

"You. Wouldn't. DARE!" Yang snarled as she prepared to break the fellow blonde.

"Oh, I do DARE." Jaune immediately retorted earning several shocked gasps. _Please Monty and everything holy, please work!_ "Now, I'm not stupid-"

"Pfft, oh really?" Yang asked skeptically with a raised eyebrow.

"I know what I'm doing. I know what will happen if I cut even a millimeter of your hair. Hell everyone does. You will no doubt put me in a permanent coma if I buzz cut this much hair off you. But consider this, no matter what happens, you lose."

"E-excuse me?" Yang asked letting panic slip a little in her voice.

"Yang, I have your hair and the buzzer in a position where if you hit me and send me in any direction, the buzzer will be knocked towards the hair in my hands and six inches of your hair gets cut off." Jaune's smirk grew. "Sure, you may beat me into an unrecognizable puddle of red. But you will lose so much for that small victory. Even if I can't cut it all, the best case scenario for you is that half of your head has hair six inches shorter than the other half."

"Y-you..." Yang stuttered. Her eyes were widened back to a violet cover and her hands started to shake at the mental image Jaune was giving her.

"Why you would look ridiculous. It would take years to grow all of it back."

"You wouldn't..." Yang was starting to panic.

"Do you want to risk it?" Both remained quiet for several moments before he ever so slowly began to guide the roaring hair buzzer towards the poor brawler's hair.

"NO!" Yang screamed as she tried in vain to pull her hair from Jaune's hand. "Please no, no, no! I'll do anything!"

"You want mercy?" Jaune asked as he leaned slightly closer to Yang. "Forfeit the match. Your perfect record or your hair. Choose wisely." Yang's eyes were moving rapidly, obviously having a heated debate inside her head. "I'm short on patience. Don't make me decide for you." _Oh this is gonna come back to bite me in the ass. Worth it though._

"I YIELD!" Yang screeched on the verge of tears and collapsed onto her knees. "I yield! I give up! Just please don't do it!" Jaune held a stern, determined face as he looked up and Miss Goodwitch.

"Uh… match goes… to Jaune Arc." Glynda slowly said, sounding as if she was trying to convince herself that what she just saw was real. All but a few in the audience still had their jaws dropped. Ozpin took a sip of his coffee, impressed that Jaune was able to subdue his opponent in such a way. Either his opponent lost or they gained such a pyrrhic victory that surrendering was the best option. _Smart._

Meanwhile, Yang retrieved her gauntlets and walked back to her seat, visibly shaking, clutching her hair while mumbling to herself that everything will be ok.

"Up next, Jaune will be facing... Blake Belladonna." Glynda announced. Said huntress grabbed Gambol Shroud and walked down towards the arena.

"Go Blake!" Ruby cheered as she waved the team RWBY flag.

"Good luck." Weiss wished.

"MURDER HIS FACE!" Yang yelled, still clutching her hair and drawing the look of several students around her.

Jaune equipped Crocea Mors, praying no one noticed him grabbing something out of his bag with his shield hand. He took a stance as Blake readied herself opposite of him. Jaune couldn't kelp but glance at the top of her head. _You know, it really is nice Blake is no longer wearing her bow of hers and showing she's proud of being a faunus. It also makes what I'm about to do make more sense._

"Both contestants are ready. You may begin!" Blake unsheathed her sword and rushed forward. Jaune charged forward with his shield raised. Blake resisted the urge to scoff at him. _He really thinks that stance will work against me again? He obviously hasn't learned._ Blake jumped up high and swung her ribbon towards Jaune to snatch the shield right out of his hands.

Just as Jaune hoped she would do.

Just before her ribbon connected, Jaune quickly repositioned his hand so instead of the shield, it snatched the bag he had concealed in his hand. Blake didn't realized what happened until the bag impacted on her upper body and exploded into a sea of a green cloud and tiny bits of leaves. Blake lost her footing and tumbled onto the ground behind Jaune.

"J-JAUNE!" Blake yelled as she climbed to her feet. "What was th-...what was in the b-...Ja-... wha was… wha...was...wha…ugh..." Blake's speech grew more slurred as she started to wobble back and forth as her pupils dilated.

"Oh nothing to worry about." Jaune said shrugging his shoulders. "Just a little catnip." The entire stadium went silent with the exception of Blake's mumbling. Everyone had a hard time comprehending what they just saw. Jaune did not just do what they thought they did. Did he?

"You know," Ozpin started gathering everyone's attention, "we do have rules against drugging other students. But we've never had an example where… catnip was used or mentioned. So technically, Jaune hasn't done anything wrong. The match may continue." Glynda stared at the man with her jaw on the floor.

Meanwhile, everyone else awaited in anticipation for what Jaune would do next. In all honesty, Jaune could just knock her over and claim victory right now, and he knew that. However, the last time Jaune went against Blake, she wrapped her ribbon around his neck and smashed him head first into the wall for the finishing blow. He was still bitter about that, and so he thought about getting a little bit of payback.

He reached into his messenger bag and pulled out a little laser pointer. _I'm going straight to Hell._ He waved the dot in front of Blake to get her attention. Her eyes widened at her new little red friend and she pounced. But the little red dot was quick, and she was determined to catch it.

Jaune let this continue for a little bit before placing the dot on the wall, and was extra careful to hold it in place. Like a predator, Blake slowly approached her unsuspecting prey. She then quickly got on all fours and pounced forward towards the dot… and slammed face first into the wall, squeaking out a "Nyeep!" on impact, and fell unconscious on the floor.

"W-winner is Jaune Arc." Glynda announced, almost unheard in the roar of laughter, with team CRDL being the loudest, that took over the stadium. Yang went down to pick up her unconscious friend. She put a glare at Jaune but quickly retreated when he pulled out the hair buzzer and pointed it at her. Jaune picked up as much of the catnip off the ground as he can and then repositioned himself so that opposite of him in the stands was team RWBY.

"Ruby Rose, please make your way to the arena." Ruby grabbed Crescent Rose and headed down into the arena and took a stance just opposite of Jaune. _Alright, Jaune seems to have a lot of dirty tricks up his sleeve. He took my sister and Blake down when they got close to him. Maybe if I keep my distance so he can't do anything to me…. then I can take him down and Weiss-senpai will be proud of me!_

Jaune took these few moments to inspect the back of his shield. _Here's hoping this rubber coating works or I'm done for._ Twirling his sword in his hand, he awaited fo- "Begin!" And there it is. Ruby drew Crescent Rose with no hesitation and began a barrage of sniper fire towards Jaune at a fire rate of a round a second. _Alright, just got to get his arms tired and then move in for the kill. Just like she taught me._

The first two shots almost threw Jaune of balance and off his feet. He dropped his sword and gripped his shield with both hands to hold his ground. He gritted his teeth as his bones shook with each impact. **Boom.** _Ow._ **Boom.** _Ow._ **Boom.** _Ow._ **Boom.** _Ow. Damn, Ruby doesn't mess around._ His shield was at a different angle with each shot so he carefully tried to pay attention to where each bullet was ricocheting towards with each angle. It was thankfully easier than he hoped because the created a huge, bright spark when the impacted against the wall, but he missed seeing where a few landed because he was blinded by the bright sparks when they impacted his shield.

After ten shots Ruby quickly ejected the spent magazine and inserted a fresh one. In the brief moment Jaune re angled his shield so that The next shot would hopefully landed where he wanted it to. **Boom.** The bullet sparked on impact against his shield, and then ricocheted. A second later, Jaune and Ruby looked up after hearing a feminine "Nyayayayayayayayayaya!" scream filled the room as a poor soul was being electrocuted. _Oops, wrong person. Sorry Blake, I was aiming for Weiss._

"Gah!" Weiss and Yang shrieked as they recoiled away from Blake as she spasmed. Thankfully it didn't last long. Seconds later she slumped forward and fell out of her seat, groaning in pain with smoke coming from her body. "You dolt!" Weiss shouted. "Look what you did!"

"Sorry!" Ruby called out sheepishly. "I didn't mean it!" _Please don't be mad Weiss-senpai. I just wanted to make you proud!_

"Ruby just...ugh. Focus on the match, we'll take care of Blake!" The Ice Queen shouted back.

Meanwhile, with everyone distracted Jaune took the opportunity and took out a vial of electric dust powder and sprinkled it all over his shield. He barely got the vial back in his bag before Ruby turned her attention to him. Ruby narrowed her eyes as she unfolded Crescent Rose into it's scythe form, spun it in the air a couple of time, and slammed it into the ground. _You made Weiss-senpai mad at me. PREPARE FOR YOUR DOOM!_ She roared a mighty battle cry that sent shivers down everyone's spine and jumped high towards her target.

Jaune rushed forward as well with his shield raise high and gripped with both hands ready to block the reaper's blow. Time seemed to slow down as everyone awaited for what was to come. Crescent Rose then impacted Jaune's shield. The impact knocked Jaune back and created sparks, which ignited the electric dust and sent high voltage electricity through his shield and Crescent Rose. Jaune was protected thanks to the rubber coating on his side of the shield. Ruby's weapon didn't have the luxury. Unfortunately for her, the voltage was just enough to ignite the nine dust round in her magazine.

Ruby stood in place, spazzing out as the electricity from her magazine electrocuted her. Many in the audience winced as they swore they could see her skeleton if only for a split second. No one knows how long it lasted, but Ruby eventually subconsciously let go of her weapon. She then fell to her knees and collapsed onto the floor. Her limbs twitching were the only indication that she didn't actually die. Well... that and her slurred mumbling about a... sand pie?

"Jaune Arc wins!" Miss Goodwitch announced. Weiss looked over to her partners. Blake was still twitching and high like a kite, muttering something about a red demon, and Yang shook her head. Sighing, she got up to go get her partner. _I hope she is ok. How dare that dunce hurt my senpai!_

She approached Ruby and kneeled down to pick her up. _I'm sorry for yelling at you. Please forgive m-_ "Ahyayayayayayayayayaya!"

The second she made contact, sparks started flying then ceased after several seconds. She was still on her knees with mouth agape and her head twitching slightly.

"Take this as a lesson class." Ozpin said. "If someone who got electrocuted is twitching, it means there is electricity still flowing through them. Don't touch them until it stops."

"I WANNA GET ZAPPED TOO!" Nora shouted as she hopped down into the arena and ran towards Weiss and Ruby. Everyone started to panic. They knew what would happen when that hyperactive demon got shocked, Ren especially. _Oh Oum no! NOT AGAIN!_

"Boop!" The cheerfully ginger cheered as she put a finger on Weiss's nose. Everyone recoiled, closing their eyes and covering their faces, and silently prayed. All Hell to break lo- "Aww. It's not working," Nora sighed sadly as nothing happened when she kept on poking Weiss's nose. Everyone calmed down and sighed in relief. Crisis averted.

"Nora, can you kindly carry those two back to their seats?" Glynda asked. Nora nodded and threw the two in question over her shoulder. "Weiss Schnee was supposed to be next, but after that I decided that she is not fit for combat. So up next is… Cardin Winchester. Mr Winchester, please enter the arena."

Cardin gripped his mace and made his way down as his teammates cheered him on. _Seems like Jauney Boy has some tricks up his sleeve. Pffft, like he can use some cheap tricks on me._

"You ready Jauney Boy?" Cardin taunted as he double check his armour straps. Jaune shrugged his shoulders. Cardin grinned he twirled his mace. "You're going to be eating through a straw when I'm done with you." The audience didn't react much, this was normal. Except for the fact that Yang and Weiss was silently cheering for the brute and Nora had the grin of a madman.

"If both contestants are ready, you may begin." Cardin tightened the grip on his mace and was about to charge forward.

"Wait." Jaune called as he held a hand up and pulled his scroll from his messenger bag. "Gotta take this." Everyone just stared at him as he started to type on his scroll. Cardin's eye twitched. _Wait a second. This… this has to be some kind of stalling action. No wait, Blake and Ruby both charged in and he countered them easily. Is he baiting me? What is he up to?_ A few moments later Jaune put his scroll back into his back and drew his weapons. Cardin was about to resume his charge when his scroll vibrated.

"What the hell?" He muttered to himself. _Did Jaune just message me something._ Sure enough, he had a picture message from him. He opened it and...and… "WHAT THE HELL?!" All eyes were on Cardin as he shrieked. "HOW DID YOU EVEN-"

"Oh I have my ways." Jaune replied innocently as he shrugged his shoulders. _Oh Sweet Monty, I'm never going to live down practically catfishing Cardin's mom to get that photo._ _And no one needs to know that._ Jaune internally shuddered. "Now wouldn't it be interesting if I hit the 'sent to all' button on my scroll." He held a finger over his scroll, trying to sound as menacing as possible.

For the first time in his history at Beacon, and to the surprise of everyone, Cardin has the paled face of true horror. The over cocky, seemingly indestructible bully, was shaking in fear. What did Jaune have? What horrible piece of blackmail was enough to bring that man down to his knees.

Cardin took in a deep breath and sighed. He knew what Jaune would ask him to do. "I yield. I quit." Cardin said as he holstered his mace and walked out of the arena and back to his seat. The second he sat down, the sounds of vibrations filled the room as everyone took out their scrolls.

"Oopsie daisy." Jaune said innocently. _Actually I'm not sorry. PAYBACK CARDIN!_ Everyone checked their scoll, looked at the picture sent, and suddenly laughter erupted and filled the arena. Cardin cupped his head in his hands and weeped. His reputation was over.

The picture everyone everyone was laughing at: a 3 year old Cardin smiling up at the camera. In a onesie, with bunny feet and huge bunny ears, holding a giant plastic carrot.

* * *

 **A/N:** _Little fun fact: This whole story began just from the small concept of "would it be legal for Jaune to use catnip against Blake?"_

 _What did you guys think? Like something, hate something? Leave a review, all criticism is welcomed._

 _Thanks again for reading, and I hope you have a good day!_


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** _Welp, here's chapter 3._

 _Hope you enjoy._

* * *

 **Chapter 3: JNPR, Civil War**

 **An unspecified amount of time later:**

"Jaune Arc wins again." Glynda announced as Jaune outsmarted and beat another student. She watches as the student walked as slumped down in his seat, looking defeated like everyone else. Some broke down and were still in tears (*cough* like Cardin *cough*). Everyone lost track of time as they continued to watch the matches. One after another, Jaune claimed victory against his opponents whether by outsmarting them, blackmail, more drugs, or by having them in a no win situation from the start. How could he fit so much in that messenger bag?. At this point, no one cared about the prize money. Everyone was focused on and just wanted the blond boy taken down. They wanted revenge against the one who was humiliating them. They wanted blood.

Ozpin was actually impressed. Jaune wasn't lying when he said he was preparing for this day for a long time. He smiled briefly. In hindsight, he wasn't as mad at Jaune for blackmailing him anymore. But he wasn't about to let it go either.

"Nora Valkyrie, you are up next." Glynda announced, and wasn't surprised to see that Nora was already in the arena. _Please don't break his legs if you win. I do NOT want to go through the paperwork again._

"Are you ready?" Nora asked her o' fearless leader with Magnhild in hand and in hammer form. _I always knew Jaune-Jaune was an invincible fearless leader! Too bad I gotta smash him into a pancake. I bet he's terrified of facing the almighty and powerful Nora, QUEEN OF THE SLOTHS! KUR-RAH!_

Jaune remained silent as he nodded. _Oh no, she has that murderous look in her eyes. But then again she always does. Okay, stay calm Jaune. YOU GOT THIS!_

"Begin!" Glynda shouted. Jaune and Nora shouted their battle cries and charged forward. Everyone gasped. Jaune hadn't full on charged anyone yet. Pyrrha and Ren seemed to be the only ones concerned. Everyone else was almost jumping with joy, believing that the Blonde's demise have come.

Nora was third best fighter in Beacon's first year class, only defeated by Pyrrha and Yang. Plus, she was unpredictable. The only plan you could really make against her is 'just don't stand still and you have a chance of leaving with no broken bones'. There is no way Jaune could have planned for her.

 **A few minutes later:**

Everyone in the audience stood corrected, and confused. In what seemed like seconds Jaune and Nora went from charging at each other with the intent to fight to the death to sitting together in the arena, making idle small talk, and sharing a giant stack of pancakes. Some could have sworn they could hear soft classical music in the background.

Ren couldn't help but smirk at the sight. He always enjoyed the sight of those two acting like brother and sister. Blake, now recovered and sober, couldn't help her thoughts as she shipped them like Fedex. Ruby, Weiss, Yang, Cardin, and everyone else watched the sight while hoping that Jaune will suffer the unfortunate fate of 'broken legs by Nora'.

"... and then I brought my hammer down and smashed its stinger down into its own skull!" Nora stated with pride as she told her fearless leader her latest tale of fame and glory. Jaune couldn't help but chuckle at his friends cheerfulness.

"Sounds like I missed quite the adventure. Wish I'd been there." Jaune said after eating a mouthful of syrup covered pancake. _Not that I'm not enjoying this, but I have a match to win. Sorry Nora._ He went to open his messenger bag and rummage through it. "Huh, I could have sworn I put it in here," he said in a false state of confusion. "Oh wait, yeah that's right".

Everyone in the audience turned their attention to Jaune. Could this be it? Is this finally his downfall?

"Hmm? What's wrong Jaune-Jaune?" Nora asked.

"I brought some special strawberry syrup to try out, but I appear to have forgotten to put the syrup in my messenger bag and accidentally left it in my backpack. Would you be so kind as to go and get it for me please?" He asked his teammate. _Please work, please work, please work._

"Sure, no problem Jaune." Nora got up and began to walk towards the edge of the arena, but then stopped right at the edge of the boundary line. Everyone seemed to perk up and wonder why she stopped. "You mean the backpack that you left in your dorm?" Nora asked as she took Magnhild in hand in it's grenade launcher form.

"Uh… m-m-maybe?" Jaune stuttered out. _Oh no._

"So you thought I would just walk out of bounds and then you'd win by making me look like a fool?" she asked as she loaded grenade rounds. Many gasps and 'oohs' echoed in the audience. She turned around to face Jaune. "Do you know what happened to the last guy who tried to trick me into doing something foolish?" She asked slowly while tipping her head to the right slightly and a smile slowly forming. The light above her began to flicker on and off rapidly as she spoke. Jaune could have sworn that her eyes and teeth glowed evilly in the dark. _Oh man, I bet I look so cool and scary._

"U-u-uh, no," Jaune tried and failed to say as calmly as possible while rubbing the back of his neck, trying to buy time for himself to think of a plan. "What did you do to them?" _Oh Oum, please give me an idea, I'm too young to die to this demon!_

"Oh Renny~", the valkyrie sang like a lullaby out to her not together-together best friend, "Would you like to tell him what happened that day~?" All eyes in the room turned to the silent lotus.

"Um… well, let's just say that before hand, Nora has never broken anyone's legs, nor has she ever wanted to beak anyone's legs before." Ren stated with a 'as-a-matter-of-fact' face while looking at Jaune. It almost sounded rehearsed. _And here I thought all the times Nora wanted me to rehearse that would go to waste. I have to admit though, it sounds intimidating Jaune does look petrified._

Nora started to chuckle darkly. _Ok, now how did I do it again...ah, like this._ Her eye started to twitch. "The doctors said they would never walk again.~" That was a lie, but no one need to know that right now. "They snapped so easily~. Like teeny, tiny, little twigs~. And they made such sweet **CRUNCH**! Ah~" Nora closed her eyes as if she was reliving a pleasant memory and licked her lips. She reopened her eyes to look at Jaune. _He, he's actually shaking! Man, I'm really good at this! I should be an actor! I always wanted to be the slasher villain._

Jaune was indeed shaking in his boots. He had forgotten the number one rule when it came to Team JNPR: Nora was a wildcard and you can't guarantee that you can predict how she'll react to anything. This was it. He couldn't come up with a plan to get out of this. _Legs, it was nice knowing you. I'll miss you guys greatly._

Was Nora really going to break his legs? Pffft, no. Nora would never do such a thing to her friends. But he didn't need to know that, and neither did the rest of the crowd. Everyone started to chant Nora's name, some louder than others (*cough* Yang and Cardin *cough*), except for Pyrrha who sat mortified as she watched what she assumed was going to be the death of her future husba- her partner and friend. _You break any of his bones and I will bury you Valkyrie!_

"Ah well," the demo- Nora said as she unfolded Magnhild into its hammer form. "I wonder how your bones will sound~." _Am I overdoing it? Nah._ She quickly stepped on her hammer and pulled the trigger, sending her into the air. Once she reached the high point, she gripped her weapon's handle with the intent to bring it down on Jaune. Well, an inch or two in front of him, she wasn't cruel enough to bring it down full force onto of her fearless leader. " **KUR-RAH!** "

Jaune rolled out of the way at the last second, screaming like a girl as he did. It was one thing to see Nora enter her 'I'm an indestructible Goddess of death and destruction' mode when fighting the Grimm or the White Fang, but having all of that directed at you is another thing entirely. He quickly shot up to his feet. _Ok, stay calm. I just got to think of an-AHH!_ Nora swung her warhammer and sent him flying straight up into the air and into the ceiling, just barely missing a light. Jaune was stuck embedded in the ceiling.

Knowing he'll fall down eventually, he pulled his arm out of the ceiling and reached into his messenger bag. He pulled out a small vial of smoke dust powder he used against many other students. _Just barely enough for a decent smoke screen. Better than nothing._ The ceiling started to shake. Nora grew impatient waiting for Jaune to come back down, so she flipped Magnhild into it's launcher form and fired 4 high explosives shells at the ceiling. Miss Goodwitch only sighed as she pinched the bridge of her nose. She was not looking forward to the paperwork she'll have to do later. _One day! Just one day of Miss Valkyrie not destroying anything! Is it too much to ask for?_

The shockwaves from the explosions caused Jaune to drop the vial of smoke dust moments before he too fell from the ceiling. The vial exploded into a large smoke cloud as Jaune landed on one foot and one knee. _I have to thank Pyrrha for that landing strategy._ He smiled briefly before jumping as a large piece from the ceiling fell and crumbled right next to him. He landed on top of his bag, and got up quickly. Jaune rubbed his butt. _Man, those syrup bottles aren't comfortable at al- wait. GLASS bottles. There's smoke and debris everywhere._ A smile formed as multiple plans popped in his head.

"Jaune-Jaune~! Come out, come out wherever you are~!" Nora called out as she smashed another piece of debris out of her way. She had low visibility in the smoke and could only see a few feet infront of her. Meanwhile, no one could see into the smokescreen. They could only guess what was happening just from the sound. And by the sound of Nora smashing everything, Jaune was in trouble.

Nora stood still and steadied her breath to try and be as quiet as possible and closed her eyes. It was a little trick Jaune taught her to better hear the grimm approaching if you couldn't see very well, especially in fog. She remained silent and unmoving for several moments. She heard a faint noise, like someone stepping on gravel behind her. She turned around with a audibly loud gasp. Immediately a few more quick paced steps were heard behind a large piece of stone from the ceiling, immediately followed by a "Oh crap!". _Got'cha Jauney!_

" **KUR-RAH!** " Nora yelled as she jumped towards the footsteps and smashed the debris out of her way. She landed on her feet behind where the debris was, with Jaune laying on his back. He sat back up and looked back up at Nora, terror filled eyes. "Hello Jaune~", she said, tilting her head and getting her voice back into creepy mode. Jaune's pupils seemed to dilate a little. _Man, I should TOTALLY be a horror movie actor!_ She then raised Magnhild with both hands. "I hope you didn't really like your legs~" She brought her hammer up with the intent to lightly boop him on the head.

At the last moment, Jaune rolled out of the way, took the mostly full glass bottle of syrup from his messanger bag, put it where he was a moment ago, and covered his head. Nora's hammer came down and smashed the bottle. Syrup went flying in every direction and coated the floor, Jaune, and Nora. Most importantly, it got in her eyes. Jaune looked up a second after he heard glass shatter and saw Nora frantically rubbing her eyes. "Gah! Can't see, can't see!" she shouted.

Jaune silently prayed to the almighty Monty for his fortune before getting back up. With her back facing him, Jaune rushed forward and tackled the energetic time bomb to the ground. He had her in a policeman's hold: one of her arms was behind her back and held down by Jaune's body, her other hand was stretched out and held by Jaune's hand while his other arm was wrapped around Nora's neck. She tried struggling, but her efforts were futile as she had little wiggle room in this hold. _Oh my Oum, I just beat Nora and both of my legs are fine!_

The smoke screen started to dissipate quickly. Everyone was eager to see Nora standing over a battered and defeated Jaune. So imagine their surprise when the smoke cleared and they saw Jaune over a restrained Nora. Half of the audience froze, baffled, at a lost of words over what they just saw. It looked like Jaune has just outmatched Nora in brute strength. That was impossible! Even Yang had trouble beating her in terms of brute strength! How was Jaune able to do it?!

Glynda was looking at her watch. _7… 8… 9…_ "Nora has been restrained for 10 seconds and is rendered unable for combat. Jaune Arc wins!" She announced, then walked down into the arena and whipped around her riding crop to fix the damage done to the arena and the ceiling. _One day, just one day of nothing being destroyed…_ Meanwhile, Jaune let go of helped Nora up and took a water bottle and a rag out of his messenger bag. He damped the rag and wiped the syrup of of Nora's face.

"You ok Nora?" Jaune asked softly. Nora snatched the damp rag from his hands and scrubed her eyes. _Uh oh, I didn't damage her eyes did I?_

"I'm fine." Nora said as she finished rubbing her eyes and handed Jaune his rag back. He put it back in his bag. "You just caught me by surprise is all." She looked up at Jaune and saw that his face had the look of caring concern, but also slight hint of fear. _Uh oh. He didn't think that was real did he?_ "I hope I didn't scare you too bad with my acting." She said with a small smile.

"Acting?" Jaune asked with both surprise and relief.

"*gasp* Jauney I'm hurt." Nora replied, faking being hurt while placing the back of her hand on her forehead for added effect. "You didn't really think I'd ever hurt one of my bestest friends, would you?" That earned a smile and slight chuckle from Jaune as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck.

"What, nah~". He replied. _Ok good, I don't have to sleep with Crocea Mors under my pillows tonight._ "But I have to admit, you were really scary back there. I'm pretty sure you could make the grimm run away with fear. You actually reminded me of those slasher guys from those horror movies I used to watch with my sisters when I was little." He smiled as he had a brief nostalgic flashback to when the two youngest sisters would cling to their big brother for protection.

"Really?" Nora asked cheerfully. _Even Jaune thinks I'm good! I can totally be an actor!_

"Yeah, defini-"

"Miss Valkerie," Glynda interrupted "if you may please exit the arena so I may call in Jaune's next opponent." She requested as she finished fixing the ceiling with her semblance.

"Right, sorry!" She called out to the professor. "Good luck Jaune," she gave him a thumbs up and then ran back to her seat.

"Lie Ren, you are up." Miss Goodwitch announced. The black lotus nodded and stood up.

"Good luck Renny" Nora cheered as she patted Ren on his back. He calmly walked down towards the arena and stood opposite of Jaune. He unsheathed Stormflower and took stance against Jaune, waiting for Glynda to announce the start of the match. The two huntsmen in training locked eyes with one another. Ren noticed Jaune had a look of confidence and determination in his eyes.

Ren has been closely observing Jaune during every match he had today. He noticed that in every match he had, he had the same look in his eyes. The only exception was when he was fighting team RWBY. When fighting the members team RWBY, he had doubt and fear in his eyes, but that completely disappeared after he took them down. Ren came to the conclusion that Jaune didn't know if what he had planned would initially work and was afraid, but then that doubt quickly faded away after the first few matches, only reappearing occasionally like during Nora's fight. If Jaune had the same look in his eyes now, the Ren was in trouble

Ren knew that Jaune has a plan to defeat him and judging by the rest of the matches that happened, Ren would be defeated either by clever tactics, a stroke of luck (that Jaune seemed to have a lot of), or by blackmail (granted it wouldn't be as bad as Cardin's, but everyone that suffered that fate would never be looked at the same way again). Ren knew he had no way to know and counter what Jaune had in store for him, so he quickly came up with a foolproof plan to avoid a humiliating defeat.

"Begin!"

"I fold." Ren calmly stated not a second later. He folded Stormflower and holstered them in his sleeves and walked out of the arena and back up to his seat. Everyone just stared at Ren in confusion as he made his way back to his seat. _Really, everyone is that surprised._

"Just like that?" Jaune asked breaking the silence, while raising his arms up to his sides in confusion. _Not that I'm complaining, but… oh well, Ren's loss._

"Yes." Ren replied "You see, I've noticed that you've been winning every single match, but you've been doing so in a way that humiliates your opponents." Many in the crowd winced, especially Cardin, being reminded of being humiliated at Jaune's hand. "It is now apparent that you have a plan for everyone. So I've come to the conclusion that the only way to win the game is to not play at all. Therefor, I forfeited the match immediately." Some almost envied not thinking of that before in order to be spared the humiliation. Jaune only smiled and shook his head, confusing Ren. "Hmm?"

"Well you see," Jaune started. _Should I tell him? Yeah, why not._ "That would have been a very smart idea. IF I had a plan to fight you." Everyone could only look back at him and Ren in confusion. _What?_

"Come again?" Ren asked in confusion.

"Ren, I'm going to be honest here. To me, you are the brother I never had." Jaune said. "You are the most logical and most caring person in this school. You've been there for me when I had some tough times going, and I'm going to repay that by whooping your butt like I did everyone else here? No. Plus you would have handed my ass to me anyway. The second the match started, I was going to offer you a deal… well a bribe, but you get the idea."

"A-a… what?" Ren asked in confusion.

"Oh, I was going to make a deal." Jaune repeated. "If you just walked out, I was going to take over pancake duty for Nora for a month. But since you quit immediately there's no need for that." He said, giving the most smug grin he could. _Nah, I'm not that mean. Maybe I'll take pancake duty for a week._ Ren kept a deadpan expression. _Dang it. Oh well._

"So wait a second." Yang said. "So you're saying that if Ren didn't immediately quit and refused your offer, he could have kicked your ass?" Her eyes narrowed at the ninja, several others joined her.

"Pretty much, yeah." Jaune replied. Ren immediately felt dozens of angry, vengeful eyes stare at him. He looked around the room at everyone staring at him and accidentally locked eyes with Yang. His face paled as he looked away. _I just stared into the face of death. Oum have mercy on my soul._ Not even a hug he got from Nora could calm him down.

"Now then," Glynda said gathering everyone's attention, "Mr. Arc, this has been a very… entertaining display." _I've never seen so many students break before._ "How ever, you do have one more opponent left to face. May Jaune's partner, Pyrrha Nikos, enter the arena!" Her voice echoed throughout the room. Time seemed to stop if only for a moment. Pyrrha slowly stood up and started to walk down to the arena. The crowd started to chant.

"Pyrrha! Pyrrha! Pyrrha! Pyrrha! Pyrrha!" Many other hoots and hollers were heard within the chant.

"Kick his ass P-Money!"

"Break his legs Pyrrha! Well not really, but still, whoop his butt!"

"Make him pay Pyrrha!"

"Give him Hell Pyrrha!"

"Kick his ass into next week Pyrrha!"

It reminded Pyrrha of when she fought in the Minstali tournaments. She smiled at the nostalgia. She reached the arena and equipped Milo in its sword form and raised her shield Akouo into a defensive stance, almost mirroring Jaune's stance. He flashed a brief smile which she returned. She also noticed that for a moment Jaune had shown worry in his eyes, as did everyone who fought her in the past did.

"Begin!" Before Jaune could even blink, Milo was transformed into its rifle form. Pyrrha got several shots off making Jaune move his shield to block the shots, unintentionally exposing his messenger bag. In a flash Milo was transformed into its spear form and was sent flying towards Jaune. He had no time to dodge, and Milo went sailing past him, snatching up his messanger bag and embedding itself into the wall of the arena in the out of bounds area. She then used her semblance to retrieve her weapon.

"Let's see you fight without your dirty little tricks Jaune." She taunted, letting her honor get the better of her for a moment and began to charge towards her future boyf- partner _. Let's see if he remembered what I thought him._ Many in the crowd 'oohed' at this. Many others face palmed at not think of that before: disarming Jaune of his bag of cheats before he could use them.

"I would've been disappointed if you didn't do that actually." Jaune said as he rushed to meet the champion's charge. _Alright, I didn't spend all of those nights on that rooftop for nothing. TIme to see if it's all worth it._ They both roared battle cries as their blades clashed. Sparks went flying from the impact of metal scraping against metal. Both combatants pushed each other back and ran to engage one another once more. The thunderous sounds of metal against metal and the yells of blows giving and taken echoed in the room.

Pyrrha was actually impressed. Jaune's sword and shield manship was on par with tougher opponents she faced in the tournaments, no doubt thanks to their training sessions of course. Jaune was mixing up quick light strike with heavy swing attacks. She had a very hard time finding an opening to exploit. When she did and went for a strike Jaune would immediately block and counter. She could have used her semblance at anytime to give her an advantage, but decided not to. She wanted to she how far her knight could go.

The audience could only watch with amazement at the skill displayed. Even Ozpin was impressed. _He really has come a long way. I knew the lad had potential in him._ Their blades locked again. Both swordsmen gritted their teeth and narrowed their eyes as they tried to overpower the other but to no avail.

"I must admit Jaune, I'm actually impressed." Pyrrha said truthfully as she pushed Jaune back and brought her sword up.

"Well, I learned from the best." He said as he blocked the strike with his shield. Two more quick strikes followed with the same results.

"So if you really wanted, you could beat anyone else here in a straight fight could you?" she questioned curiously as she backflipped to dodge an attack.

"Eh, not really." He admitted, using his shield to block incoming fire from Pyrrha's rifle. "I still like the indirect approach."

"Like cheap little tricks?" She quickly reloaded her rifle.

"It's more of 'knowing what makes your enemy tick and and knowing the right time to use it to subdue them.'" He quickly responded. Pyrrha faked an upward slash and struck Jaune on his side. Grabbing his side and falling on one knee in pain he couldn't block Pyrrha's next downward strike which send his shield flying off the side, out of his reach. _You fought well Jaune, I really am proud of you. But this is where it ends._ Pyrrha brought her own sword down on him. Jaune blocked it at the last moment. Jaune held her sword at bay, but she was gaining the upper hand and was pushing him down.

The crowd was going wild. Jaune has finally met his match and was going to pay for humiliating them. Jaune knew he would be defeated if he didn't act now. He had come too close to lose now. _Well as I said before, It's all about timing._ Mustering what strength he had left, he roared as he pushed upwards forcing Pyrrha's weapon up as well. The second he was back on his feet, he quickly let go of his sword and grabbed her head with both hands.

"So I guess you could say I'm not an oblivious fool," he said quickly and pulled her towards him, locking her lips with his. Many loud thuds echoed throughout the arena as dozens of jaws dropped and hit the floor. Pyrrha froze, eyes widened with shock. _Program 'Pyrrha-exe'_ _has encountered an error and can not compute. Program 'Pyrrha-exe' has shutdown to prevent damage._ After several second (that felt like hours), Jaune pulled back from the kiss. Pyrrha was still frozen.

"Uh, you ok Pyr?" Jaune asked. She stayed frozen for several more seconds before finally passing out and falling into Jaune's arms. _Yep, I broke her. Opps._

"And Jaune Arc wins!" Glynda Goodwitch announced. Most of the audience were still too shocked at what happened to applaud.

"Congratulations Jaune!" Ozpin acclaimed. "That was a very extravagant and entertaining performance young man. Well done. As promised, 500 lien will be transferred to your account for winning the tournament And as a bonus for such a display of cunning skill," Ozpin could feel half of the students' eyes narrow at him, "you can be excused from all classes all day tomorrow."

"I-wow. Thank you sir!" Jaune exclaimed with joy.

"No problem, just make sure Miss Nikos makes it back to her dorm safely." Jaune nodded and walked away while carried an unconscious Pyrrha bridal style. Once Jaune left the room, Ozpin quickly pointed to a random student. "Quick, pull out the chart!" The student nodded and pulled out a whiteboard from somewhere offscreen. Everyone shot up and brought their attention to the chart.

What's so important about this chart? Well, everyone in Jaune's year and some professors started a betting pool about when Jaune and Pyrrha would admit their feeling for one another. Everyone bet on a different date on when it would happen. The student pulled out a pointer and pointed to the current date and time on the chart. He read out the name that was there. "Peter Port. Professor Port won."

"Ha! That's right!" Port bellowed after seemingly appearing out of nowhere. "Pay up everyone!" Port smiled with glee while everyone else groaned as they handed Port their money.

* * *

 **A/N:** _Nora's fight had to be the most fun I've ever had while writing something. For some reason it kept on deleting "Pyrrha-exe" every time I used a '.', so I had to replace it with a '-'._

 _Well, Jaune just officially beat all of Beacon's first year class. And everyone is going to be good sports and not hold a grudge about it, right... right?_

 _Like something, hate something? Leave your opinions in a review._

 _Thanks for reading, have a good day._


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** And _here's the chapter where no one holds a grudge and Jaune lives happily ever aft- oh who am I kidding. Pray for Jaune, he's going to need it._

 _Also fun fact, I accidental uploaded chapter 1 here before I realized my mistake and put the real chapter 4 up. Oops._

 _Anyway, enjoy!_

* * *

 **Chapter 4: It came back to bite him in the butt**

 **The day after Jaune beats everyone, mid afternoon: Professor Port's classroom**

Everyone was a little confused as to why Professor Port was late to his own class, but they paid little mind to it. Everyone was still bitter and sore from being beaten and humiliated by Jaune Arc yesterday, well everyone except Pyrrha Nikos. She was a little mad at Jaune for deciding to reveal he felt the same way about her to win a sparring match, but on the other hand he confessed that he didn't plan it and it happened out of a panic. Not that Pyrrha minded in the end. He was a comfy and warm body pillow.

And a excellent kisser.

The doors opened and all eyes turned to it, expecting Mr. Port, but were surprised when Ozpin was there instead. "Apologies for running late." Ozpin said while walking to the front of the room while adjusting his glasses. "I found out only recently that Professor Port took the day off," _no doubt to enjoy the 10,000 lien he won yesterday,_ "so I will be filling in for him today." He took a sip from his trusty mug and set it down on the table.

"Normally this would be grimm studies class, but I'm not going to teach that today." Everyone perked up at this. "Instead, let's talk about teamwork."

* * *

 **The next day, little bit after noon: Beacon Cafeteria**

Jaune wasn't sure what it was, but something felt off. It felt as though he could pick up the faint sense of murder in the air, but he pushed it aside. Most of the students weren't still bitter about how he humiliated them 2 days ago. Sure some were still a little mad, but it was nothing too serious.

He pushed it aside and assumed everyone was mad about the now extra long lunch line since the foreign students for the Vytal Festival arrived yesterday. After finally getting his food he made his way and sat down at his usual table with his friends. Everyone, especially Yang, noticed how close he and Pyrrha were sitting together and began to tease the new couple.

They didn't mind of course. Pyrrha was too use to this kind of thing by paparazzi, while Jaune was too distracted by something on his mind. _What is that buzzing noise? Am I the only one that hears that?_ His thoughts were interrupted when someone came up behind him.

"Ah Mister Arc." Ozpin said as he walked up to the table. "I trust everything has been going well these past few days?" Jaune turned to face him.

"Oh uh yeah, everything's going great." Jaune happily replied. "What can I help you with?"

"Oh, well I just wanted to drop by and make sure you know what you missed in class yesterday." He paused to take a sip from his mug. "You really didn't miss much since classes at the start of a new semester are basic introductions. The only real important thing you missed was a lesson on teamwork." The cafeteria grew a little quiet as Beacon's first year students recognized that Ozpin said the code phrase. It was time to prepare.

"Teamwork?" Jaune questioned, his head tilted a little to the side. "Like 'working together can make you accomplish anything' kind of thing?"

"Not necessarily." Ozpin chuckled. "More along the lines of 'if someone is giving you problems, gather your team and beat him up' kind of teamwork." A smile formed on his face as Jaune's widened in confusion.

"Wait what?" _I don't like where this is going._

"Mr. Arc, Beacon Academy is a combat school where we teach students to fight monsters for a living. We do sort of teach violence as a way to solve your problems." He took another sip of his coffee. "In fact we encourage it. Especially if it's in retaliation to things such as bullying, any form of harassment, humiliation, being drugged or electricuted... blackmail." Ozpin said, putting emphasis on 'blackmail' as his eyes narrowed and his grin widened.

The implication was as clear as day to Jaune. _Uh oh. Maybe I got little too cocky with blackmailing him._ The cafeteria was suddenly filled with a not so pleasant noise. Jaune quickly scanned the cafeteria and saw all of his classmates preparing their weapons and other various forms of equipment, ignoring the confused from the upperclassmen and exchange students. The exits on both sides of the cafeteria were blocked by 2 teams each. _Oh no._

He quickly turned back to his friends for comfort, but found none. Blake and Yang smirked while pulling out a brown paper that had a peculiar buzzing noise coming from it. Weiss and Ruby glared daggers at him as they pulled out their weapons… and some tasers that made a terrifying noise when they turned them on. Ren was humming to himself as he polished the blades on Stormflower with a cloth. Nora had a hockey mask on with what Jaune hoped was red paint splattered on it. Pyrrha had her arms wrapped around his, oblivious to the rising tension in the room.

"You uh..." Jaune said, his body shaking with fear as he turned back to the Ozpin, "a prestigious headmaster such as yourself wouldn't allow such senseless violence to happen in such a delicate area, would you?" _Please be bluffing, please be bluffing, please be bluffing…_

"That is true, it is part of my job to break up fights and keep the peace." A small glimmer of hope built up inside Jaune. "However, one can not stop something if they are not around." He took another sip and checked his watch. "Oh my, it does appear I am late for a meeting. I best get on my way." Ozpin made his way to one of the exits with a smug grin on his face. Jaune stared at the retreating headmaster before looking back at his friends, and then locking eyes with his partner.

"P-p-py-Pyrrha?" He stuttered. _Please don't want to kill me too!_

"Oh don't worry Jaune, I would never hurt you, ever." She responded gleefully with her head tilted to the side.

"Oh thank Ou-..." Jaune sighed with relief until he realized Pyrrha was using her semblance to move him and his chair to the center of the room.

"In fact, I was so taken away by how much of a big~, strong man~ you are, I couldn't concentrate on your matches a few days ago to see how you beat everyone. This is the perfect opportunity to see you do it again~." She said with a smile, despite the look of betrayal and fear on Jaune's face. _Don't worry. From what Ozpin said, you'll be fine. If it gets too heated we'll jump in and save you. And make sure you properly thank me later~._

In truth, Ren, Nora, and Pyrrha we actually impressed with Jaune's performance. But they also knew that with the whole first year student body against him, it'd be suicide to stand by him. So they opted for the next best thing: pretend to be part of the crowd so they could minimize the damage with out drawing attention to them. That way they could make Jaune didn't die, they remained fine, and Nora could continue practicing her acting

"G..g..guys?" a shaking Jaune stuttered out as he looked around the cafeteria. "F-friends?"

* * *

Ozpin made it to the exit where team CRDL were guarding. Cardin opened the door for Ozpin. "Why, thank you." Ozpin said.

"Not a problem good sir." Cardin happily replied. "I was always taught to respect my elders."

"Just go easy on him." Ozpin whispered as he walked passed Cardin.

"No promises." Cardin whispered back. _This is gonna be good._ Ozpin walked outside and Cardin closed the door behind him. Ozpin stood there and waited. Two seconds passed. Three. Four. Fi- the door locked with a click.

" **GET THAT MOTHER FUCKER!** " Ozpin smirked as her heard Cardin's muffled yell through the door. It was immediately followed by the sounds of weapons being drawn, tables and chairs scraping against the floor, the terrified screams from Jaune, the various battle cries of the other students, the sounds of melee weapons classing and bullets flying, and the shocked gasps of the second, third, forth years, and transfer students who were present. Ozpin smirked when he saw an irritated Glynda angrily speed walking to the cafeteria.

"Not to worry Glynda." he said, stopping Glynda with a hand on her shoulder. "Everything is fine."

" **KUR-RAH!** " Yelled a student, followed by a loud 'thud' that shook the ground.

"B-but Opzin-" Glynda tied to say before she got interrupted.

"Jaune Arc will be fine." He said confidently as he took another sip.

" **NORA THAT WASN'T JAUNE, THAT WAS THE LEADER OF TEAM QPTR!** " A calm but loud voice yelled.

" **SORRY, CAN'T SEE WELL WITH THIS MASK!** " replied the sloth girl, who wasn't actually sorry.

"I'm not worried about Jaune." Glynda said.

"Oh?" Ozpin raised an eyebrow.

" **FOR SENPAI!** " two huntresses shouted immediately followed by the sound of high voltage electricity, and the sound of a poor blond being electrocuted. " **HOW'S IT FEEL, HUH?!** "

"'I'm more worried about how much damage there's going to be that I have to fix." Glynda sighed.

" **RELEASE THE BAG OF BEES!** " A certain cat faunus commanded.

"Glad to see your priorities are still in order Miss Goodwitch." Doctor Oobleck said as he and Peter Port walked up to them. They nodded at each other in greetings. "Told you he would do it." Oobleck gloated as an irritated Port handed him some lien.

" **FEEL THE WRATH OF BUMBLEBEE FURY!** " The faunus' partner yelled with glee, followed by the painful screams of Jaune and those few unfortunate enough to get caught in the swarm.

"You're still one hundred percent sure Mister Arc will be alright?" Professor Port asked?

"Indeed I do." Ozpin replied.

" **BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!** " Oobleck and Port raised their eyebrows and slightly opened the door and peaked through.

"They tired him to a stake." Port explained what he saw.

"And they lit it on fire." Oobleck said.

"Oh don't worry. He'll be fine." Ozpin said as he joyfully sipped his coffee to the screams of the blond boy. "And he'll learn a valuable lesson from this."

"Which would be?" Glynda raised an eyebrow.

"I don't know." Ozpin shrugged, walking away, "But I'll bet he'll learn something." Glynda sighed and followed him.

"This is almost exactly what happened with team STRQ." Oobleck pointed out.

"Yep. Ah, good times." Port stocked his mustache getting lost in nostalgia. "Good times." Jaune was then sent flying as a spear took him off the stake and embedded itself into the wall, above the door where Port and Oobleck were, must to the disappointment of the angry mob.

"Oops. Sorry." Pyrrha falsely apologized to the angry mob. Jaune took the spear out of the wall, unpinning him self. He landed in front of the door and ran through them.

"Excuse me! Sorry!" Jaune shouted as he ran through the door, knocking the two professors out of the way. Seconds later the horde of Beacon's first year class came through chasing after the poor blond boy.

"Wanna go follow them?" Oobleck asked.

"Eh, nothing good on tv anyway. Sure, why not?" Port replied as the two ran after them. _Exactly like old times._ The cafeteria was silent the second, third, and fourth year students, as well as the transfer students juts sat there in the now ruined lunch room. Food was littered everywhere. Tables and chairs were scattered about. Bullet holes and slash marks riddled the walls.

"What the bloody hell just happened?" a redheaded pirate broke the silence.

"No clue, but what ever that guy did to piss everyone else off, I feel sorry for him." his blue haired teammate replied.

"Told you guys this school was exciting." their monkey faunus leader exclaimed with glee. The sound of conversation filled the room once again.

"What did that boy do to get everyone mad?"a red eyed, green haired student asked.

"No idea, but I want to join in with the mob." her silver haired partner laughed to himself. He looked over to his bos- team leader as she cupped her chin in her hands, lost in deep thought.

"Interesting." she muttered out loud.

* * *

 **Later that evening after the famous 'Jaune Beatdown', Team JNPR's dorm room.**

"I'll admit, I'm surprised Jaune doesn't look worse." Ren said as he, Nora, and Pyrrha looked over a sleeping Jaune, mumbling in his sleep. Despite the pulverization Jaune went through, the worse he had were a couple of bruises, his uniform got torn up a little, and he fell unconscious due to bump on his head that Nora kept denying was her fault.

"Well, you remember what Ozpin said." Pyrrha replied to Ren.

" 'His semblance is basically plot armor, he'll be fine' " Nora said in a mock Ozpin voice.

"Well I'm off to bed then. Goodnight." Ren said as he collapsed onto his bed.

"Night." Pyrrha yawned as she snuggled up against her warm, and thankfully not dead boyfriend.

"Night!" Nora shouted as she dolphin dived into the bed.

* * *

 **A/N:** _Poor Jaune can't catch a break can he? At least he's still alive._

 _Anyway, thank you guys so much for reading. I hope you enjoyed it and I hope you have a good day._


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** _So it's been close to two months. What's been keeping me from updating? Work, social life, friends, Delta Airlines (f***ing cancellations galore), Aruba, asshole sharks in Aruba (no joke, almost died, wasn't fun), my beta being a lazybutt, etc._

 _So anyway, after all of that, I finally got a chance to sit down and write what was to be the aftermath day. .. and nothing work. No idea I came up with flowed well or fit with the story's them and I felt like I was beating a dead horse. So I scrapped that idea._

 _But I still wanted to do something and then I thought: "I kind of glanced over the 'Jaune Beatdown', why not expand on it?" And that is what this is. I also went back and very slightly edited the ending of chapter 4._

 _I apologize for the long wait. Thank you guys for being patient and I hope you enjoy!_

* * *

 **Chap. 5: Random moments during the Jaune Beatdown**

"Oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap!" Jaune muttered to himself as he rounded the corner. After his escape from the cafeteria he was able to lose the angry mob of Beacon's first year students. However, Weiss, Blake, and Yang had found him and chased him into one of the dormitories. Though they spotted Jaune at a distance, giving him an advantage, they were catching up.

"Get back here Arc!" Yang yelled behind him. He peaked behind him to see the trio riding on Weiss's glyphs to catch up to him. Shrieking, he turned another corner and dread filled his heart. The hallway he entered was long, with no off branching paths he could take except a T intersection at the end. WBY would surely catch up with him, no matter how fast he ran.

"JAUNE!" The three women shouted from behind the corner. To Jaune, it sounded like a choir of angry witches that found their next victim. He looked behind him to see the trio slow down as the rounded the corner before Weiss' glyphs picked up speed. Jaune's brain worked in overtime to quickly find a way out. Come on brain please! I like living! He then remembered something he saw on the news earlier… would it work? _Well, Weiss is a Schnee…_

"Hey Weiss, look!" Jaune shouted as he pointed behind the murder squad. "Faunus protesting!"

"Wha?" Weiss looked behind her but then immediately turned back forward. The actions took less than half a second, but because they were going so fast they passed Jaune who ducked out of the way, and Weiss couldn't brake in time. With loud yelps, they crashed into the wall at the end of the hallway, Blake and Weiss stuck in a spider web of cracks while Yang went through the wall and landed on the other side.

"Sorry!" Jaune called out before running back through where they came. Weiss finally managed to free herself from the wall and fall down face first. After picking herself and dusting off her shoulders, she turned to Blake, who was looking at her in disappointment.

"Wow Weiss. Wow." Blake said, shaking her head.

"Oh shut up!" Weiss retorted back. "You were a terrorist! You have no right to judge me!" While the monochrome pair continued to bicker, they failed to notice that a certain pun loving blonde was missing. Where did she go?

 _(a few moments earlier)_

"Don't you see Flynt, because Beacon is so much more lax than Atlas I can finally throw another one of my raves like back in highschool!" Neon shouted with glee as she shot her hands in the air.

"I don't know kitty cat," Flynt Coal teased his teammate, "are you sure you still have the funk in you? "

"Hey, my raves were the best!" Neon retorted, playfully jabbing a finger on Flynt's chest. "People were practically bursting through the walls to get in." At that moment, the wall next to them exploded inward and a busty blonde girl came in and crashed into Neon. They fell on the ground, with Neon on the bottom and the blonde girl's head placed between her boobs.

"See!" Neon gloated as the blonde girl groaned while slowly getting up. "This place is gonna be awesome!" Her jazzy partner could only shake his head in amusement.

* * *

Jaune collapsed behind a pillar as he caught his breath and wiped some sweat from his forehead. The bunny hood was hotter than he thought. Yes, a bunny hood, with fluffy little ears included.

He didn't know how he got in this situation. Someone somehow managed to tackle him and tape the hood to his head, and a bunch of other students somehow acquired horses to ride and chase him "for the hunt." He'd been running and dodging, with mixed success for over an hour. However, he hadn't run into anyone for an hour, so he thought he could catch a small break.

"Found ya Jauney boy!" A voice bellowed to his left accompanied by the galloping of a horse's feet. "FORE!" He gasped and turned his head just in time to see Cardin's mace swing towards his face and sent him flying, arms flailing and screaming.

"Damn, he went flying," Cardin said as he turned back towards his partner, a small ice cream themed mute. "Nice swing Neo." he complimented. Neo then shouldered his mace and gave a salute with her free hand with a big smile on her face.

After the fiasco in the cafeteria, Cinder sent out Emerald, Mercury, and Neo to find out more about this Jaune Arc fellow. By chance, Neo stubbled upon Cardin and decided to follow him. She thought he was nice company once you get to know him. Joining in on the mob to beat up the blond boy was fun too.

Jaune landed and bounced a couple times some distance away. He groaned in pain and just wanted to lay there in the warm sun. "There he is! Capture him! Zwei, get the rabbit!" he heard Ruby shout, followed by a few barks from her dog, the cheers of more than a dozen students and their horses, and a trumpet playing a charging tune. He immediately got up and started running.

He rounded a pillar and noticed that a dormitory building was in front of him. After a moment, Jaune realized what building it was. He smiled as a plan formed inside. "Don't let him get inside!" One of the students shouted as Jaune entered through the door with Zwei hot on his tail. All of the horses skidded to a halt just outside the door.

"Aw crap, our horses can't fit through." A student said as he got off his horse.

"Don't worry, Zwei will get him!" Ruby exclaimed with a raised fist. You will have vengeance Weiss-Senpai! "Get the rabbit Zwei!" Ruby shouted in reminder.

"Well I guess the only thing left to do now is dismount and wait for the mutt to return." Cardin said, earning a glare from Ruby. Everyone dismounted and waited, making idle small talk about news, class, and what they'd do to Jaune. A few minutes passed by before the door opened up.

"Zwei's back!" Ruby exclaimed. Everyone else rushed over to to her to watch Zwei drag his captured prey. Zwei let go and sat next to his prisoner with his tongue hanging and his head tilted to the side, not showing any care for his fellow humans' confused faces.

Well to be fair, Ruby did instruct Zwei to catch the rabbit, and Zwei did indeed catch a rabbit. He just didn't catch the right one. Before them, Velvet Scarlatina was tied up, blindfolded, and gagged, squirming against her restraints.

"Uh, how did Zwei tie her up?" Sky asked in a whisper. Ruby shrugged. Cardin and Neo smirked, suppressing their chuckles. They liked this dog.

"Uh, should we like… untie her?" Russel asked, drawing the eyes of everyone around him. "I mean, won't the rest of her team come looking for her?" Everyone's eyes widened in fear at the thought of an angry Coco and Yatsuhashi after them, except for Neo who just looked around in confusion.

Dove and two other students who were close by immediately rushed forward to untie her. The two students undid the binds on her legs and arms while Dove went for the gag and then would go for the blindfold. But as soon as he cut the gag of, Velvet immediately started emitting high pitched meeps.

"OH GOD NO!" Cardin yelped as her dived forward to cover Velvet's mouth with his hands. With Velvet muffled, Cardin turned his head to see everyone staring at him. "Have you guys never watched the discovery channel?! That's the noise rabbits make when they in danger! It's a distressed ca-" the words died in Cardin's throat as the sound of thunderous footsteps reached his ears.

Zwei and the horses immediately ran away out of fear. Everyone slowly turned their heads to the sound of death approaching. In the distance they saw Coco Adel, Fox Alistar, and Yatsuhashi Daichi sprinting towards them. Their weapons were drawn, and they looked pissed.

"Death machine formation!" Coco called out as they hopped into formation. Coco hopped onto Yatsuhashi's shoulders with her minigun ready. Fox strapped himself under Yatsuhashi's rear shoulder armour strap with his blades ready. Team CFVY had different battle strategies when they were missing one or more of their team. Death machine was when Velvet was missing and or in danger. Yatsuhashi would act like as the heavy hitter and bulldozer, Fox would slash anyone who tried to flank them, and Coco would mow down anyone out of Yatsuhashi and Fox's reach.

The first years have seen CFVY perform that maneuver before with devastating results against the Grimm, and now it was to be used against them. They were frozen like deer in headlights, too afraid to move, except Ruby who used her semblance to cheese it. Even Neo held onto Cardin while trying to hide behind him as CFY jumped into the air to perform a spin-ground pound attack.

None of them noticed that Velvet had slipped away.

 _(Meanwhile, at the second floor window of a stairway, right above where Jaune entered the dormitory)_

"So uh, that's about what happened. Sorry." Jaune sheepishly apologized to Velvet for running up to her and knocking her down, hoping Zwei would confuse the two of them with his orders to 'get the rabbit'. Velvet had her arms crossed and was giving him a crossed look. _Well, she has a right to be mad. I did kind of sacrifice her to Zwei._

Two loud clanks drew their attention to the window, where they saw Cardin and that brown and pink haired girl pressed against the window before sliding down with a loud screech and finally fall off. They both suddenly became aware of the sounds of a one sided battle happening covered her mouth to hide a smirk.

"Ok look, just… please don't do anything like that again." Jaune nodded in response. Another student smacked and bounced against the window, screaming as she fell back down to the ground. "Now run along, I need to make sure my team doesn't actually kill anyone." Jaune thanked her again and ran off while Velvet ran for the exit to the floor below her.

She finally made it and went out the door. She was greeted with the sight of a warzone. The ground was littered with cracks, lacerations, and bullet holes. Fifteenth or so students lay scattered about bruised, beaten, and unconscious. She saw her teammates with their weapons drawn, slowly approach Cardin and that pink/brown haired girl. They were embracing each other in a tight hug while lying down, cowering in fear. An idea formed in her head.

"Guys wait!" Velvet called out, catching everyone's attention while running towards the doomed duo. She calmly walked up to them with her hands behind her back. "Please don't hurt my long lost baby brother~." She said in an older sister, teasing kind of voice. CFY looked at Velvet with puzzled expressions before bursting out with laughter. Cardin lowered his head and groaned in shame. Neo didn't have any idea what was happening.

"Oh, you're one of the transfers so you wouldn't know." Coco said after calming down. "Jaune apparently leaked an embarrassing photo of Cardin when he was a kid. You wanna see it?"

"Coco no!" Cardin shouted in fear.

'Coco yes!' Neo screamed internally.

"Coco yes." Coco said as she showed Neo the photo of a little Cardin in a bunny onsie on her scroll. Neo blushed as she turned to Cardin with the biggest grin she could muster on her face. Cardin's head dropped to the ground. Damnit! Now this girl thinks I'm a dweeb!

Neo gave him a few reassuring pats on the back. _Screw Roman and screw Cinder, this man is mine! AND WE'RE GOING TO HAVE BABIES AS CUTE AS HE WAS!_

* * *

It was the late evening and Ozpin was enjoying a sip of coffee when the elevator pinged and opened its doors. Ozpin saw Jaune Arc and Nora Valkyrie exit and walk up to his desk. "Hello Miss Valkyrie." he nodded in greeting. "And hello to you Mister Arc. You look worse for wear."

"Yeah well, that tends to happen when the headmaster basically says it's open season on me." Jaune retorted, looking down and examining himself. He was covered in some small bruises (most were already healed by his aura), and his cloths were torn and stained.

"Anyway, what can I do for you and your teammate?"

"Well, I was thinking..." Jaune started, a smirk formed as he realized Emerald was doing her part since Ozpn hadn't noticed her, "You were the one to give the okay for the witch hunt, so I figured that you would be the only one able to call it off."

"Yes, that would be a logical conclusion." Ozpin replied, cupping his chin. "But what makes you think you can order me around so easily?" _That photo is already deleted. What are you planning Mister Arc?_ Jaune moved his hands behind his back, and smiled as the unseen Emerald put an invisible object in his hands.

Jaune remained silent for several moments. "That's a very nice coffee maker you have Mr. Ozpin. A Valen Coffee Deluxe model 2,300 if I'm not mistaken."

"Why yes it i-" Ozpin said as he looked behind him, only for his smile to drop and his eyes widen as his coffee machine was missing. He turned back quickly to see Jaune holding it in his hands. _How did he do that?!_

"I heard that these make the best quality coffee around. I know that Coffee Deluxe unfortunately closed down a decade ago, so they don't make these anymore." He placed the CD 2,300 down and took a few steps forward. "It would be such a tragedy if yours just suddenly… stopped working." Nora chuckled as she raised her hammer, ready to smash the kitchen appliance into a million tiny pieces.

 _(meanwhile in an undisclosed location)_

The angry mob of Beacon students cheered. After their failure to get revenge on the Arc boy all day, they all gathered together to combine as one to come up with a plan to get revenge on Jaune once and for all.

The plan they came up with was brilliant. It was the most brilliantly brilliant planned plan ever in the history of plans. Should Jaune discover their plan and plan around their plan, they had a backup plan which involved planning a plan around the plan Jaune would plan while planning around the original planned plan. It's the perfect plan!

Just as they were about to mobilize, the loudspeakers came to life.

"Attention students," the calm, emotionless voice of Headmaster Ozpin said, "as much fun as today was, I must unfortunately call off so called 'witch hunt' on Jaune Arc. While amusing to watch, we've taken enough property damage for one day. Thank you and goodnight."

All the student groaned in frustration. Their glorious brilliantly brilliant planning had been in vain.

 _(back in Ozpin's office)_

"Thank you and goodnight." Ozpin said. He turned of the intercom and turned back to Jaune and Nora. "There! It's done! Now please give it back!" he said quickly, in a panic.

"Very well, a deal is a deal." Jaune said as he and Nora turned to walk to the elevator. He tossed the coffee maker back at Ozpin, who dived over his desk to catch it.

"Shh," Ozpin cooed while stroking the machine's 'head', "It's ok Coffee-chan. You're safe now."

In the elevator, Jaune fist bumped his teammate and new friend. "Awesome job guys. Emerald, thank you for helping out, that semblance of yours is amazing!"

"No need to thank me." Emerald friendly replied. Cinder would probably be mad that two students now knew her semblance, but at least she became friends with Jaune Arc, the boy who apparently beat everyone in his class in one day and managed to avoid them all today. He could be a very useful ally in the future.

She also managed to upload the virus directly into Ozpin's computer. Cinder was hesitant to give her scroll, with the only copy of the virus, to Emerald, but the thought of putting it literally right under Ozpin's nose was too good to pass up.

"You too Nora. You managed to get Ozpin shaking. You could totally be a horror movie actor!" Jaune praised his partner, who turned around in a blush.

"Aww it was nothing. Anything for my fearless leader!" she cheered as she swung Magnhild onto her shoulder. As she shouldered it, she heard two loud thud, followed by two more a second later. She turned around to see that she accidentally hit them in the head, knocking them out. "Oopsie."

 **END**

* * *

 **A/N:** _And there we have it folks! Like it? Hate? Leave a review, all opinions are welcomed._

 _Will I work on more stuff? Yes, but I don't know when. I decided to take up writing fanfiction as a pastime hobby, so I don't know when I'll start working on something else._

 _Thanks to everyone who liked, favorited, reviewed, and help support this little story, I really appreciate it!_

 _Thank you guys so much for reading and I hope you have a fantastic day!_

 _…_

 _…_

 _…_

 _Actually… because I took so long and kept you guys waiting, here's a little bonus. Two days ago, drunk me watched the video 'the adventures of Uncle Crow' 'by MurderofBirds, and drunk me got inspired to write something based of it. I was going to delete it, but ultimately decide to fix the grammar and include it as a bonus because you guys are awesome._

 _Enjoy!_

* * *

Qrow was on a mission.

A very important mission.

A personal mission.

He wasn't out to scout for Ozpin.

He wasn't out to hunt down Grimm.

He wasn't out to take out a White Fang cell.

He wasn't out to take in a super criminal.

Nor was he out to conduct another panty raid on Winter Schnee's dresser.

To be honest he stopped after Winter booby trapped her dresser.

Today was the day Beacon Academy held its initiation.

The test that would prove the worth of the upcoming students.

His two nieces, Yang Xiao Long and Ruby Rose, would be participating in it.

And he was going to watch them.

His didn't plan on intervening should they, and they will, run into trouble.

They didn't need it.

They were capable, strong warriors.

He should know, he helped train them.

He took pride in it.

But that's a story for another time.

Right now, he was morphed into the form of a crow.

Flying high above the Emerald Forest.

Trying to find his nieces so he can watch them kick ass.

And he couldn't find them.

This was usually the time when Ozpin would launch his students off the cliff.

So where was everyone?

Was he too late?

Was old age finally getting to him?

Then a familiar noise to his left caught his attention.

He turned his head towards the noise and saw Yang.

She was flying through the air, using her shotgun gauntlets to propel herself as she flew through the air.

Yeah, that's something she would do.

Guess he showed up a little early.

But now where was his other niece, Ruby?

He heard a whistling noise and looked up.

He saw the red reaper that was Ruby Rose.

Flying towards him at 100 miles per hour.

SMASH

"Birdy no!" the little reaper cried out.

Ruby kept on flying to wherever she was flying, sad that she thought she just killed a poor little bird.

Qrow was sent spiraling out of control.

And he lost a lot of his feathers from getting hit by the niece missile.

Losing control and falling fast, Crow turned back into a human to try and land carefully.

It didn't work.

He landed face first into the dirt and skidded across the dirt.

He finally managed to lift his face of the ground, spitting out a mouthful of dirt and grass.

Behind him he saw that he made a very long trench in the ground.

Groaning and aching in pain, he stood up in a hunch and began to walk away in shame.

He went to reach for his flask but couldn't find it.

He sighed.

He really hoped no one saw that.

(elsewhere)

Ruby Rose landed and took out Crescent Rose, ready for combat.

However, other thoughts plagued her mind.

"*sniff* that poor birdy. His family will never see him again. I'm sorry!"

(Meanwhile)

"What's so funny Ozpin?"

Ozpin gave his scroll to show Glynda the recording he was watching.

Glynda lost herself in a fit of giggles.

She sent a copy of the video to herself and to Winter.

(later)

Crow downed another shot at the bar.

Then his scroll started to buzz.

It was a picture message from Winter.

Did she finally cave in to his good looks?

Nope.

It was a picture of him face down in the dirt.

It was followed by a picture of Winter laughing.

He scoffed.

Damn you Ozpin.

(The next day)

Ozpin frowned at what he saw on his desk.

His coffee mug was smashed into a million tiny pieces.

The only clue to the perpetrator?

A lonely bird feather.


End file.
